The exploding belly

Bedrest: check.

Cervix: check.

Baby: check.

Boredom: ?

Is it bad that I am not bored yet? I am kind of enjoying this lying around hanging out doing nothing business. I watch some TV and surf quite a bit and generally just relax.

Josh's sister, Marnie, was here preggo-sitting (as she amusingly calls it) and she wistfully said she hopes they put her on bedrest at the two-week mark because this is her dream. I must admit, it's not such a bad gig right now.

I kind of view myself as an incubator.

And with all this extra time to surf the Internets, I can find some pretty random shit.

Let me present Exhibit A.



You may ask yourself "Self, what in the sam hell is that?!"

Well, here is your answer. "In this photo provided by Everglades National Park, the carcass of a 6-foot alligator is shown protruding from the gut of a 13-foot Burmese python last week in the park. Scientists think the snake exploded because the gator fought back after being swallowed."

WHAT!?

That is the craziest shit I have ever seen. You know the old adage about your eyes being bigger than your stomach? Ummm, yeah. Snake, what were you thinking? I am not sure how the logistics of a snake swallowing an animal that could bite it in half actually works, but the story sheds a little light.

"'If the python got a good grip on the alligator before the alligator got a good grip on him, he could win,' said Frank Mazzotti, a University of Florida wildlife professor who is an expert on gators and other reptiles.

Mazzotti thinks that as the gator was being swallowed, it clawed at the python's stomach, making the snake burst."

And that ladies and gentlemen, is what I imagine will happen in the 40th week of pregnancy. You stomach gets so big it just pops.