What's that smell?

Yesterday was quite the adventure in our house.

Our cat, Lucy, the one we used to call "the little one" until she got so fat that her stomach hangs and flaps around when she walks, was cuddling on my lap while I worked.

And she seemed fine, normal even. She was lying on my arm while I tried to type so I did what any self-respecting cat owner would do and I tried to type one-handed. Because I am loving like that.

And then the SMELL commenced. At first I thought maybe the cat just farted. Then I realized, no, that's lasting too long.

So I followed the smell into the cats' bedroom. Yes, the cats have their own bedroom. We're two people living in a two-bedroom corporate apartment. We spoil them.

As the smell got stronger, I followed it to the cats' bathroom. Yes, they have their own bathroom too. Shut it.

And there I discovered the stench of death. Supersonic olfactory pregnant woman was immediately knocked out of the room, staggering for air, air damn it! I covered my face with the neck of my T-shirt and went back in, hoping for cover in case I needed backup.

I saw the kitty diarrhea and realized my morning was ruined.

Of course, I have no idea at this point who is sick. I have not seen either of the cats slink into the litter box and it's not like I would have paid attention before the stench anyway. And the stench was even worse than normal as whoever the culprit was did not take the time to cover this with other litter.

So I find Lucy and inspect her. Yep, there's some yellow kitty poop on her fur. Perfect.

Let's review: kitty diarrhea, horrible death smell, litter needs to be cleaned, pregnant, can't touch kitty litter, home alone, facing death from smell. Did I mention the smell?

So I go into the kitchen and I sheath my hands and forearms in gallon Ziploc bags. And I grab the scooper and scrape some litter over the poop. Success! I then walk around the entire bathroom and cat room area spraying air freshener. The same air freshener that has been outlawed in this house for the last nine weeks because the smell makes me nauseas. But it was the lesser of two evils at this point.

As I am smugly congratulating myself on resolution of this issue, I notice that Lucy has also puked. In three places. Even more hilarity ensues.

So I clean that up, while she tries to nose in and "help" me.

And that's when it hit me. This is going to be my life in a mere six months. Cleaning up someone else's poop and puke. Except it will be every day. All day.